Hair conversations with my daughter
I have natural hair, and so does my daughter. Hers is soft and silky. Mine is still trying to find itself. It’s been an interesting journey, changing my approach to hair care, redefining my assumptions about hair. No mineral oils and petrolatum. And so far, I find my hair does not take to any oil, except when I put it in twists. No oils means I need less shampooing. Washing with a conditioner works well for me. Glycerine products (Sta Soft Fro specifically) work like a charm for me in summer. Winter is still a challenge for me.
As I fix my daughter’s hair (I often french braid or do a few plaits or twists), I wonder why anyone with hair like hers would ever want to ruin it. While I struggle with dry hair in winter, hers stays soft and moisturized. So I hurt when she says “mommy, can you make my hair straight?” She tells me that her friend Tim (not real name) told her that her mommy needs to brush her hair a hundred times for it to be straight. “Mommy, can you brush my hair one hundred times?” Apparently, Tim has a sister and that’s how Tim’s mom makes his sister’s hair straight.
“Some people have straight hair and some people have very very curly hair like you and me”, I explain. “And your hair is very pretty. Do you know that?”
“Yes I do. But my friend B has straight hair and her hair is pretty too”. “I think her hair is called blond”, she added.
She continued, “mommy, I think white people have straight hair that is blond. And brown people don’t have straight hair”.
“That’s right”, I agreed.
She immediately jumped on that. “But mommy, some brown people have straight hair”. She went on to list two friends who are brown with straight hair.
“I think they made their hair straight and people can do that if they want to. But you see, your hair is so beautiful that you don’t have to make it straight. And you can do so many things with your hair.”
“Ok. Can you make my hair straight?”
